The Body Reading Journal #2 Grow until reach the sky

The book, The Body illustrates the growth of the kids who travels to see a dead body of a kid. They are from different backgrounds and problems, and by going through the journey, they met what could be their enemies and grow up while going through. Also, they share the concerns that have been torturing, and heals each other.


The rumors about the dog chopper told that it is such a hellhound that will make people who go across the junkyard disabled. However, the chopper they met was a relatively small dog who they were able to tease at. By this experience of meeting the childhood monster, they realize how the things they used to fear could be really small and nothing, and that they don't need to be afraid of the monsters. Even though they seemed to still have fantasy about the under-bed monsters, when they grow up a little more, they will again realize that there's no such thing as the under-bed monsters, and remember their experience with chopper to laugh about it again.


While they were realizing the truth about the Chopper, Teddy meets an ordeal as his personal hero was ranked down by the Milo, the junkyard keeper. He said that Teddy's father was a loony. Teddy highly respected his father as he once have stormed the beach in Normandy, even though his father once almost killed him. As Teddy's father was attacked, he got mad, and almost tried to fight the Milo. But his friends managed to control him and get out of the junkyard. By this experience, Teddy learns that there's no need to care about what the others think of the person who he loves, as Chris said. Even though the others try to insult the respected one, it doesn't change that the value of him, which makes him still respectable.


Vern was a coward who was scared to go along the railroad that was on a bridge. While he was going through, he walked like a grandma who's not able to walk comfortably. Also, when the train was coming, he was trapped in terror that he couldn't move so fast. Still, he ran and was able to dodge the train. Dodging a moving train was Teddy's wish. And as Teddy was always making fun of Vern's cowardliness, it should have been a nice punch. It didn't change the Vern from inside-out as he was still afraid in the forest and many places. However, the experience gave him pride and honor of train dodging, and it must have helped him to grow up and escape the cowardliness.


Gordie lost his brother and was treated as a troublemaker in his house. His father tells him to have a nicer friends, and sometimes Gordie thinks that he should have died instead of his brother Dennis. He was living in his brother's shadow. However, whenever people tried to compare Gordie with Dennis, he managed to show them what kind of person he was. Especially when Ace mentioned Dennis to make Gordie to hand over the dead body to them, Gordie showed his toughness by threatening them back with a gun. It showed that he was a grown up guy with guts to stand up for what he think is right. It's much valuable than playing football very well, which is the aspect that people praised about Dennis. Gordie showed that he is too good to be in Dennis's shadow.


Chris, who is my favorite character, has once stolen milk money, and returned it. However, his teacher just took it, knowing that people won't believe Chris even if he claims that the teacher stole the money. Chris believed his teacher and she betrayed them, and it left as a scar in his mind. I felt very sorry and sad when I knew about his behind story. Children should carry their fantasies until they reach the appropriate age. Chris was too young to know the dirtiness and selfishness of human beings. But the teacher who should be leading her students to morality and help them to carry to the fantasies just broke them. I'm not a grown up yet, but this made me to wonder about the role of the adults; what adults should to for their children to help them keep their dreams, and how to present them a better world to live and love.


The best part was when Gordie wanted to stay with his friends and give up a better education. Chris was really angry and told Gordie that he shouldn't waste something that God gave him. It made me to remember a similar scene in the movie, Good Will Hunting. In that movie, a gorgeous mathematician Will works as a cleaner of universities, and wish his life to continue in such way. So, his friend Chuckie said,  'Fuck you, you don't owe it to yourself man, you owe it to me. Cuz tomorrow I'm gonna wake up and I'll be 50, and I'll still be doin' this shit. And that's all right. That's fine. I mean, you're sittin' on a winnin' lottery ticket. And you're too much of a pussy to cash it in, and that's bullshit. 'Cause I'd do fuckin' anything to have what you got. So would any of these fuckin' guys. It'd be an insult to us if you're still here in 20 years. Hangin' around here is a fuckin' waste of your time.' I thought that The Body and Good Will Hunting were trying to deliver a same message. The importance of using one's own talents and the value of real friend. Real friends help their friends when they are going to a path that's wrong and regretful. They don't get jealous. But cheer up and help. I thought that I also wanted to be a friend like him. And that if I had friends like him, I would have been really happy.


Even though they had many adventures, it didn't change them very much. Even after all the journey, they acted as young children who had same problems to solve . However, it certainly changed their views toward the world. The town that has been everything to them felt small. They have gained the chance to grow up. Reading this story made me to think back about my childhood (although I'm not so old) and feel nostalgic. I think reading this book was a nice chance to sink in memories, remembering the times I had overcame the similar problems they had.

Creative Essay: 11/27/31

This is my second day in India. Today morning, I received an e-mail explaining that the seminar I came to attend is going be postponed from 12/01 to 12/03. I't because the world climates are terribly unpredictable that it messed up the whole airline today that many people won't be able to attend the seminar at the time. I was actually happy to receive the mail (sorry for those who got damaged by the hurricane that occurred simultaneously) as it meant that I will have more free time in this country.

It's been a while to attend a seminar that required people to actually gather. I preferred offline seminar but I was really busy these days as my research was coming to the end, and the students asked me a lot of questions as it was near the final exam. So I was only able to attend online. However, this seminar was really important that I even canceled my other schedules to attend. Thank God that final was over as I wouldn't be able to reject my students. I was planning to reveal my research conclusions to the world through this seminar as the other people attending helped my project by answering my questions that I had and sharing some of their opinions. Therefore, I wanted to show them some respect by making them the first one to see my full outcome.

Yesterday, I walked around various famous places, taking pictures and drawing croquis' as it is my hobby. I should have been preparing for the presentation today, but the seminar has been postponed, so I decided to expand my leisure. I planned to visit where my educational volunteer organization is working. I was always sorry to order them and help them from distance, so I thought that this was a great chance. So I went to the head office of India branch. They greeted me warmly. After short talk about the current situation of the organization, I asked them if I could participate in today's volunteer, and got approved.

Even though the cities of India has been developed, the countries remained the same. I went to a small school where the organization worked. I brought some snacks for the children, and while they were eating, I asked how they were doing. Even in hard situations, they looked very bright, so I was relieved. I took pictures with them. The master of India branch told me that the number of Indian student volunteer was even lower than the number of students from other country. So we opened up a meeting, and concluded that the advertisement of our organization was too weak. And we planned to make posters to hang on 15 universities.

I left the further planning to the branch, and came back to the hotel to eat dinner. As southern India was summer in these days, it was still bright. I checked my e-mail and there was a new e-mail saying that the seminar will be held on 12/05. It didn't really mattered to me as I had nothing until my birthday, which is 12/20. I guess I saved some more days. Maybe I'll be able to help putting the posters in universities tomorrow.

TED: David Carson on design+discovery

Designing is a field that doesn't have a criterion precedent to follow. It's a filled with sense of humor and creativity to grab attention of people. David Carson shows myriad slides to introduce the world of designing and its characteristics in a very doggerel way. And when watching the video, it reminded me of a book Put on an Engine on Creativity by Hyunwoo Lim, which is a book about using creativity; especially on advertisements and designs. 


Design sends "message that's sent before somebody begins to read, before they get the rest of the information; what is the emotional response they get to the product", according to David Carson's speech. I think it is true. There are some designs that touches me even without making me to try to figure out what the design is about and what it is telling. Designs and advertisements are very ephemeral. People flip them over in very short time. So prodigal or esoteric wordings will be futile and mundane. Leaving a strong impression concisely is important, therefore the importance of emotion in designing augments.

David Carson gave an example of smoke-free design that he created. In small letters, it says, 'If tobacco companies can lie, so can we.' It's very humorous, but it looks very gravitational and professional as the design is in black-and-white color. When people first see the advertisement, they will worry and throw away their cigarette, as the advertisement looks very serious. And when they read the advertisement again, they will laugh at the humor that's hidden inside, and remember the danger of cigarette that is tacit in the advertisement, as the creativity leaves strong impression, helping the people to remember 

In the book, it showed a WFP's picture on Times, by Rein Skullerud. The picture illustrates a terrible repercussion of tsunami. Even among all the broken furniture, there's one tree alive that shows the hint of recovery and hope. When people first see this picture, they don't read the caption under the picture written in infinitesimal letters about the hope in the terrible scene. However, they get the lucid impression of hope by the standing tree itself. It shows that even in such a horrible situation, there's still something that's not lost. And it helps people to overcome.


At his closure in the video, he defined a good job, and it really hit me. He stated, "if you could afford to--if money wasn't an issue--would you be doing that same work? If you wouldn't, what the heck are you doing? you're going to be dead a really long time." I think this statement was for young people who are afraid to jump in and dedicate on the field of designing . However, it hit me too, as I was also worrying that what I want to do aren't revered in the society and it doesn't guarantee me of nice future. However, if I'm working on the job only because of money, then I'm not living my own life or living alive. I want to live genially, so I worried living a miserable life out of lack of money. However, a life only for earning money is more terrible. It might be a hackneyed dictum, but my own definition of a good life is that if I don't regret anything when I'm dying; it was a good life. And after I watched this video, I thought that to live an un-regrettable life, I should jump on to what I really want to do. Like the David Carson, who devoted on designing.


The video didn't states his one strong idea and espoused, but showed his small and many ideas of living and designing. And most of his ideas impressed me. I strongly recommend this video, as it is very humorous yet has significance that has power to change and inspire people. Also, the book carries the message that emphasizes the importance of creativity and audacity. So I recommend to read the book after watching the video.

Top Band -Season1

(# of pictures in this review/out of 10)

Top band is a name of a TV show. It's a band audition program where amateur bands compete against each other by tournament. And before the actual competition, they can choose their mentor among the famous experts of rock music and have lessons.  I really like this program, not only because I love rock music, but also the program helps the bands of Korea.

Korean indie bands aren't that famous among Korean people. So they suffer out of low income and interest. The program director was planning to make a documentary about the lives of Korean indie bands. However, the broadcasting station recommended the director to make a competition program, as it was a trend. So the program became in a shape of tournament among the bands, but it still carried the intention to advertise about bands.

The program showed the current situations and the hard times they had to overcome in order to present their music to the world. It was very impressive. The biggest problems they had were people's views toward them. When they declared that they would be musicians, their parents and friends opposed them. One father even threw a guitar out of the window to stop his son. And even after they became musicians, most were unpopular, so they had to suffer greatly. As the program contained such behind stories, people could learn about the backgrounds of the music. And as the program contained rock music itself, it advertised rock music to the public. The participants of the competition had a same goal, which is to notify Korean Indie rock music to the public, they helped and cheered each other.


Also, there are other types of bands than rock bands with electronic instruments. For example, there are Latin music bands, orchestra-like bands, brass bands, and many more. Also, people with musicians as jobs aren't the only ones who play in band. There are people who plays as a band member, but has a different job. Top band introduced these types of bands to the public, allowing publics to break the prejudice about bands, and giving courage to the minor bands and musicians.

Other competition programs had lot of operation behind the program to make the show more entertaining, like faking the statistics and directing people's every movement. However Top Band didn't had any. So the process was very clear, but it was less entertaining than the other programs. For example, Broken Valentine team, and Toxic team, who were considered to be in top4, had match in the round 16. So the Broken Valentine couldn't even go to the round 8, because the matching system wasn't controlled, and was out of drawing lots.

Also, as indie rock music is more about pursuing one's own music style than entertaining the public and adjusting to match the people, it certainly has limits as a TV program. As public's choice was included in the score, bands with unique and special styles had advantage. Also, visual was involuntarily included in the scorings as people preferred bands that were visually good.

Even though the program had few problems, it still had good effects on advertising the Korean indie bands to people, and it was very entertaining to me, as I really liked rock music. I am looking forward to seeing the participated bands in a bigger stage like the famous bands that came and performed for celebration. Also, I'm looking forward for the season 2 of Top Band.

The Body #1 Reading Journal

In the book The Body by Steven King, characters shared a treehouse to hang out and have fun. They played games and hid important things or things they didn't want others to discover. It's their own territory and others, especially adults, didn't have rights to invade without permission. If they tried to, the boys would have resisted to the invading force.

My friends and I also had a similar place too when I was a student of an elementary school. There was a church right beside our school that my friends and I also went, and at the bottom of the church, if you go over or under few pipes, there was a small secret field that nobody used or care. It was a open space, without ceilings, but it was deep inside so nobody really wanted to approach. It's surrounded by trees and a huge three machines that we assumed to be heating machines. So people can't see us, but we can observe people outside through the trees. 

We first found out the place out of curiosity. We were unbeatable elementary school children, and there was nothing we should be afraid of. We wanted an adventure, and we thought going through the pipes into a deep, unexploited place of church seemed to be the adventure we were looking for. We went through the pipes  and found the beautiful place. We declared it as our territory and gathered when the church ended. The field was too small to put things in there or play, so we only used the it as a gathering place and  a conference room where we discussed what we should do for the day. We also found a pot and his our treasures we found in process of searching and hid the pot in our secret place.

When we were entering the place, a few younger kids saw us and tried to follow. We said that the place was our own so do not dare to invade and scared them off. However, one time we felt that there has been someone who has been in our secret place, as our pot wasn't on the right place we used to hide. So we collected ash from the field, as farmers were burning the stems of rice after harvest, and spread it around our secret hiding. It was like animals placing their smell on their territory. We thought that the people will be afraid to come any nearer as they won't want their shirts get dirty, and we used it to detect the footprints that others would leave. We once were so obsessed with the idea of protecting our place from strangers, that we tried to make walls with bricks. Even though the place wasn't really ours, but the church's. 

The church people knew about us and created iron fences around the place so we couldn't reach there even though we passed the pipes. We were very angry, but we didn't have any power to rip off  the iron fence. We couldn't understand the adults as there was nothing important nor dangerous in that place. It was just a very small and simple field. So we decided to use the iron fence for ourselves. Unfortunate for the church people, we were very physically talented. We were able to use the walls to climb and jump over the fence. So the fence couldn't stop us, but it stopped the other kids form invading our place. We were satisfied. 

Even though it's a very embarrassing past to me, I miss it so much. And if I have a chance, I want to go back and visit the place once more. I believe the treehouse to the boys in The Body will feel the same. When they grow up, the treehouse, which is a place they have spent most of their time will be the most missing place. And they will be able to remind the other memories of their childhood. And I'm looking forward to peek their memory they will remind when they think of the treehouse, by reading this book.

(It was placed inside the circle, behind the trees.)

Reading Journal #1 - Being meaningful

(Matthew West- More)

(I thought this CCM matched the theme of my writing, and my experience.)

In the book Rita Hayworth and Shawshank Redemption, there was a character named Red. He was the narrator of the story, and the best friend of Andy, who was the main character of the story. He was the one who could get anything for others in the jail. And that's how Andy and Red became friends. Also, even though the buying and delivering things for the others didn't do any good to Red, he still did the job as he really appreciated the title of 'the person who can get things to you'.

When Andy and Red were talking about leaving the jail, Andy asked if Red could join Andy's business.  However, Red presented his worries about being useless outside of the jail. In the jail, he was a very important person who had the power to bring things in. But at outside, there are others who already had the job that Red have had in the jail. He was worried to loose the title and the power at outside. That was one of the reasons why Red was afraid to leave the jail.

I also had the similar feelings when I first came to this school, KMLA, which is a very admired high school in Korea, I believe. When I was attending a normal middle school, I was a smart girl with other special abilities, like playing flute. All teachers who taught me knew me and remembered my name. When there was a question, my classmates brought that them to me and asked for help. When I gained awards, people took it for granted.

However, in this school, nobody noticed me. I wasn't smart. There were other people who had the title 'smart'. I didn't have other special extra abilities. It's something more like 'required', as every other people had it too. Teachers didn't know my name. I wasn't special at all, so I wasn't worthy to be remembered by others. I had to bring my questions to others in order to solve it. I lost the title as Red lost his title at outside of his world, Shawshank. I lost all confidence I used to have and I became very negative. I wondered if this place was where I should really be. If I was at ordinary high school, maybe I could have been just like I used to be in the middle school. Good old days. Other people looked marvelous and there was no place for me to fit in. I considered myself very miserable.

Red must have felt the same when he was thrown out of his cozy Shawshank. Even though the place was where other jail people wished to be, it was certainly not for Red. People didn't pay attention to Red, and he was a replaceable worker to the society. He must have felt very miserable in repeated life that he could never get used to. Being in a place where doesn't belong to the person creates big pain. Red accepted Shawshank as his place and rejected what we call 'normal life'. Being outside of the Shawshank created him a big deal of pain.

However, he found his place in the world. It was with Andy. Andy saw Red's values and created his place even though the society classified him as 'useless'. Andy cheered Red up and gave him hope. Because of Andy, Red could stand up and went on a journey to find his place in the world, not like Brooks, who couldn't find his place in the society and finally died.

In my case, God worked as Andy. When I was down and felt miserable, he was with me and kept said that I was also precious. As I gained the confidence back, I could see my state more clearly without any negative blinders. I actually was able to fit in this school. I found my place in here too. It's not a well-known and respected place like I had when I was in the middle school, but it's a place where I can have fun and feel comfortable and protected. I'm doing many activities that wouldn't have been allowed if I quit this school and went to normal high school, like the club activities and school projects. I also helped some of my friends by listening to their stories and being together when they were going through harsh time. I realized that I wasn't the only one who had such concerns.

Still, the school is very challenging and I feel miserable sometimes. However, I never think of quitting this school anymore. It's all my life and experience. If I just stop everything right now, I am sure that I will regret my choice even after I die. I hope Red feels the same after he meets Andy and start the business. The time gap that was created because of the imprisonment isn't an easy enemy. They will have times when they face big troubles and miss the Shawshank. However, I hope they will take that as one of the experiences that they missed while they were in the jail.
I hope they never lose their hope and keep heading forward.
I hope at the time they die, they don't regret things for not challenging.
And when I continue to live on this harsh world, I hope I kept considered myself as a beautiful person, no matter what.
I hope

Green Day-metafiction

I'm a tree located on a windowsill of a typical Korean high school. It's a very typical school with lots of students in a small classroom, and the small size of the room actually helps me to observe them. Observing these students is very interesting. When a person called teacher comes, they all fall asleep. However, when the teacher leaves, they all wake up and move around. Even though the 'teacher' is changed, it's always same.


The 'teacher' is also very interesting. Everyday, he or she talks about tests. Especially the big test named Suneung. Students looked very bored when the subject is brought up that they tried to ignore. Also, the teachers categorized students into groups and treated them unequally.


My life is very peaceful. Even though the kids are very noisy and energetic, they never torture me. Actually, it's more like they don't care about me, except only one girl who waters me everyday. She's a very strange girl. I can't see her. She's blurry. I don't think she really is blurry, as other kids don't seem to feel the difference. It's very weird.


Mentioning weirdness, there's another thing that's very strange. I know somethings that I shouldn't now as a tree. For example, I understand the lectures that the teacher is teaching. It's as I have taken this class before. It may be from last year's lecture, but last year, the classroom I'm located was used for freshmen, so the lecture should have been different. Also, I don't remember listening to the lecture. I just know it.


Back to the girl, she was a perfect person. Or should I say whom TRIES to be perfect. She was smart, kind, humorous, and active, but sometimes very unstable. For example, she once got one question wrong on the math quiz. The quiz was unusually hard, so she did well compared to the others. But she couldn't satisfy, and studied only math for about 3 days even during the other class times, before she fainted shortly in the school. When she woke up, she resisted to go to the hospital or tell her parents about it. Also, a kid who really hated the girl was very mad one time, and slapped her face. But the girl was smiling, like she didn't know how to get angry. Or like she was restraining herself too much.


It seemed that teachers and her parents are expecting very high on her. People took granted about her good scores, and when she didn't pay attention on the class, teachers would scold her. And tell her that the they were very disappointed at her, even though the other kids never paid attention. 


She became more and more unstable. I wanted to help her somehow. I really felt pity. And on final exam, she got really low score. Her teacher and parents were upset, but not like she was. She was pushing herself too much. She looked really tired. And one day, she wasn't there during the class. I was looking out of the window, and


She was falling down.


Everyone and I panicked. 


I wondered, 'Why does she has to be perfect?' It's her life, so there is no need to care about the others' views. She should be the master of her life, but she let the others to have control. Expectations are expectations, not the final goal, and moreover, they're other's expectations. Also, other people weren't that strict on her either. Her parents were worried and yes, they scolded her. But suicide?  I don't know. I mean.. I don't, I don't understand. 


Life is important. Everybody knows. And everyone has their own sufferings. I can't blame others for giving up their life as I am not them and I can't fully understand their suffer. But it's really sad that the girl forced herself too far and that's the reason she committed suicide. It's not her parents, teachers, or the financial problem or unemployment. Herself. And that's the tragedy, I believe. I really wanted to help her, and now she's gone. She was smart. She deserved a better life. She had the power to have a better life. It's sad.


How do I know that the exact reason she committed suicide? I don't know how, but I know. I know what her parents have told her, and how she felt about the people around her and all the situations. This is weird. Now I realize, it's very strange. How do I know it all? I'm only a tree who has been placed on the windowsill for my entire life. No I'm not. I don't remember being put here, or any past before this class started. I'm a tree, a very small tree. No I'm not. I'm not a tree. Who am I?


The world is spinning












Beep-
Beep-
Beep-
Beep Beep Beep Beep


"Zoomi, you woke up!"
"Oh, thank God!"
"Are you okay? Can you see me? Can you hear me?"


They are my parents


"Wha.. What happened?"
"You threw yourself from the rooftop of the school building!! Luckily, you only broke your leg! Oh my god I was so scared! I thought you would never wake up from the coma!"
"Yeah...?"
"Well, the patient needs time to relax, so please leave the room"
"Okay, doctor. Zoomi, see you this afternoon."


They left and I was alone. I thought about the dream I had. Do I really deserve a better life? I didn't realize it when I was living like crazy. This is my second chance to create my life story that many people wanted. I really wanted to make it valuable. I wanted to find something that I really wanted to do, and put my passion on it, not on maintaining on my reputation and situation. 


Sun is shining brightly and shedding light through the window to the room. And there is a small tree on the windowsill.


Who are YOU?